We had another first this morning...
Rudy went into Caleb's room to get him ready for the day. He found Caleb standing in his crib, holding onto the rail and grinning at him. Good thing we lowered his crib mattress last weekend. Otherwise, he might've been over the top and on the floor.
Tonight, we went to the mall to have Caleb's picture taken with the Easter Bunny. He did great. As usual, he thought it was so funny and was the star of the show.
Friday, March 30, 2007
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Spring is Here!
I have lots to write about. I hope I can remember it all.
On Thursday, 3/15, we all went to the Baby Fair at the Parkway Early Childhood Center. Caleb enjoyed watching all of the other babies, but I can't say that we learned very much. We did make a fun toy and Caleb got to crawl all over the tumble mats to get some great exercise.
On Friday, 3/16, Caleb and I (once again) headed for the airport. We flew to LR to see Memmie and Poppie. Hannah was visiting them, too, so Caleb got to meet one of his 2nd cousins. We had a relaxing visit with Memmie and Poppie. Rudy made the drive down to meet us on Sunday.
Caleb had a couple of big developments on Sunday, 3/18! He learned to go from laying down to sitting up all by himself! We were pretty excited about that advancement, but he shocked us even more right before bedtime when he decided to pull himself up to standing by holding onto a stool. He was so proud of himself and we were so excited for him. The best part was that Memmie, Poppie and Pat got to share the excitement with us.
Monday was a busy day for us. I had 3 job interviews in Little Rock and Rudy had one. I haven't been writing about our possible move to Arkansas, because I didn't want to count our chickens too early, but now that things are looking more like we're going to be moving, I'm a little more comfortable with it. It actually all started last summer when Caleb was only 6 weeks old and we made our first trip to Arkansas with him. When we saw how much our families loved him, we realized that it meant everything in the world for Caleb to grow up close to the majority of his family. We talked a lot about it on our way home to St. Louis and decided that we would do what we could to make it happen. The rest would have to be up to God. That was June 2006 and now it's March 2007. God is beginning to show us glimmers of hope that it might actually happen. We have had some promising job interviews and the housing market is starting to turn around. We are excited about this possibility, but very sad about leaving the people that we have come to love here in St. Louis. That is the only hard part about the whole situation. It will be wonderful to be closer to our parents and grandparents, but we will be leaving behind some loving people and two fantastic jobs here. We know, however, that we have to do what is best for our family.
Back to Monday - I had my interviews and Rudy had his. After that, we were on our way to Ft. Smith to spend some time with Jan and Chris. We were about halfway there when my phone rang. It was the school district that I had interviewed a couple of weeks ago when I was in Arkansas. The secretary told me that the superintendent and asst. superintendent wanted to interview me on Wednesday morning at 7:30. Yikes! I told her that would not be a problem.
When we got to Ft. Smith, we enjoyed visiting with Jan and Chris. We ordered pizza and relaxed at the house for the evening. On Tuesday morning, I grudgingly said goodbye to Caleb and Rudy and headed out to shop for an interview suit. I finally found what I needed and then headed to Hot Springs to spend the night before my interview. I enjoyed the night "at home" with Mom and Mr. L. I got up early on Wednesday morning and drove over to Bryant for my interview. It went very well and I was finished by 8:15. I left the superintendent's office and drove around the area for a while, just to get my bearings in case the job were to be offered. I then drove back to Ft. Smith and met back up with my boys. Wednesday night we went out to eat and packed up to leave the next morning.
On Thursday, 3/22, we went to Rogers to see Grandma and Grandpa Voise. We had a nice lunch with them and they enjoyed seeing Caleb. After lunch, we headed back home.
On Friday, 3/23, Rudy and our neighbor, Broc, went to the Sweet 16 basketball games here in St. Louis. Jerry offered Rudy the tickets for free, so they couldn't pass up the opportunity. I had already planned to go over to Jen's to crop, so Rudy and I bit the bullet and got a babysitter for Caleb. Katie is in the band at RSHS, so Rudy knew her and felt comfortable with her keeping him. She said that he was good the whole time and only cried for a few minutes at bedtime.
Saturday, 3/24, was a little stressful for us. We had a real estate agent come over to look at the house and get the process started for listing it for sale. As we walked around, she showed us things that needed to be repaired and changed in order to make the house more marketable. That completely stressed me out! The wierd thing is that I already knew all of the things that she said, but just hearing them made me freak out! After she left and Caleb went down for his nap, we got started on the list. I did some touch-up painting and Rudy worked in the yard. We also rented a storage building to get some things out of our way so that we will have more room to work and to declutter the house.
Today was a little more of the same. I didn't feel too hot today, so while Rudy worked outside, I rested a lot and gathered my strength to go back to work tomorrow. Rudy has tomorrow off, but I have to go back to work. Yuck.
2 notables from today: Caleb cruised a few steps on the couch for the first time and he is now consistently giving us kisses. He just opens his mouth and leans right in. We always have to wipe our faces after a Caleb-kiss, but they are worth a little drool.
On Thursday, 3/15, we all went to the Baby Fair at the Parkway Early Childhood Center. Caleb enjoyed watching all of the other babies, but I can't say that we learned very much. We did make a fun toy and Caleb got to crawl all over the tumble mats to get some great exercise.
On Friday, 3/16, Caleb and I (once again) headed for the airport. We flew to LR to see Memmie and Poppie. Hannah was visiting them, too, so Caleb got to meet one of his 2nd cousins. We had a relaxing visit with Memmie and Poppie. Rudy made the drive down to meet us on Sunday.
Caleb had a couple of big developments on Sunday, 3/18! He learned to go from laying down to sitting up all by himself! We were pretty excited about that advancement, but he shocked us even more right before bedtime when he decided to pull himself up to standing by holding onto a stool. He was so proud of himself and we were so excited for him. The best part was that Memmie, Poppie and Pat got to share the excitement with us.
Monday was a busy day for us. I had 3 job interviews in Little Rock and Rudy had one. I haven't been writing about our possible move to Arkansas, because I didn't want to count our chickens too early, but now that things are looking more like we're going to be moving, I'm a little more comfortable with it. It actually all started last summer when Caleb was only 6 weeks old and we made our first trip to Arkansas with him. When we saw how much our families loved him, we realized that it meant everything in the world for Caleb to grow up close to the majority of his family. We talked a lot about it on our way home to St. Louis and decided that we would do what we could to make it happen. The rest would have to be up to God. That was June 2006 and now it's March 2007. God is beginning to show us glimmers of hope that it might actually happen. We have had some promising job interviews and the housing market is starting to turn around. We are excited about this possibility, but very sad about leaving the people that we have come to love here in St. Louis. That is the only hard part about the whole situation. It will be wonderful to be closer to our parents and grandparents, but we will be leaving behind some loving people and two fantastic jobs here. We know, however, that we have to do what is best for our family.
Back to Monday - I had my interviews and Rudy had his. After that, we were on our way to Ft. Smith to spend some time with Jan and Chris. We were about halfway there when my phone rang. It was the school district that I had interviewed a couple of weeks ago when I was in Arkansas. The secretary told me that the superintendent and asst. superintendent wanted to interview me on Wednesday morning at 7:30. Yikes! I told her that would not be a problem.
When we got to Ft. Smith, we enjoyed visiting with Jan and Chris. We ordered pizza and relaxed at the house for the evening. On Tuesday morning, I grudgingly said goodbye to Caleb and Rudy and headed out to shop for an interview suit. I finally found what I needed and then headed to Hot Springs to spend the night before my interview. I enjoyed the night "at home" with Mom and Mr. L. I got up early on Wednesday morning and drove over to Bryant for my interview. It went very well and I was finished by 8:15. I left the superintendent's office and drove around the area for a while, just to get my bearings in case the job were to be offered. I then drove back to Ft. Smith and met back up with my boys. Wednesday night we went out to eat and packed up to leave the next morning.
On Thursday, 3/22, we went to Rogers to see Grandma and Grandpa Voise. We had a nice lunch with them and they enjoyed seeing Caleb. After lunch, we headed back home.
On Friday, 3/23, Rudy and our neighbor, Broc, went to the Sweet 16 basketball games here in St. Louis. Jerry offered Rudy the tickets for free, so they couldn't pass up the opportunity. I had already planned to go over to Jen's to crop, so Rudy and I bit the bullet and got a babysitter for Caleb. Katie is in the band at RSHS, so Rudy knew her and felt comfortable with her keeping him. She said that he was good the whole time and only cried for a few minutes at bedtime.
Saturday, 3/24, was a little stressful for us. We had a real estate agent come over to look at the house and get the process started for listing it for sale. As we walked around, she showed us things that needed to be repaired and changed in order to make the house more marketable. That completely stressed me out! The wierd thing is that I already knew all of the things that she said, but just hearing them made me freak out! After she left and Caleb went down for his nap, we got started on the list. I did some touch-up painting and Rudy worked in the yard. We also rented a storage building to get some things out of our way so that we will have more room to work and to declutter the house.
Today was a little more of the same. I didn't feel too hot today, so while Rudy worked outside, I rested a lot and gathered my strength to go back to work tomorrow. Rudy has tomorrow off, but I have to go back to work. Yuck.
2 notables from today: Caleb cruised a few steps on the couch for the first time and he is now consistently giving us kisses. He just opens his mouth and leans right in. We always have to wipe our faces after a Caleb-kiss, but they are worth a little drool.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
An Update
Paci rehab is officially over and separation anxiety has returned. Caleb is back to crying every time we leave the room and at least whimpering a little every time we put him down. He hasn't slept the past two days at Carrie's and I told her today that I was okay with some tough love...AKA - let him cry it out. That being said, we always stay close by and we always make sure he's okay, but he's NOT getting out of bed without a nap or at least a quiet rest. I think she was glad to hear that.
Our parent educator, Amy, came last night and was apparently pleased with Caleb's development. He is doing some things that she was surprised to see: putting toys inside of containers, playing reciprocal games, etc. She suggested that we continue what we're doing and not worry about him at all. She gave us some good ideas for making the battle of wills at mealtimes a little better.
On that note - Caleb LOVES to feed himself these days. He likes to eat graham crackers, cheerios, Gerber puffs, cheese crumbles, deli meat, and diced vegetables, especially green beans. He gets very frustrated when we try to feed him with a spoon and tries to grab it out of our hands at least twice per meal. We gently tell him, "nice hands" and then continue feeding him. If the grabbing continues, we just take the food away and walk away from him for a minute. We come back and try again after a minute or so. If the grabbing starts again, we say, "Uh-oh, all done." and take it away completely. He is not happy when that happens!
Tonight, after eating an entire jar of sweet potatoes, Caleb had some diced green beans on his highchair tray. Rudy and I were talking about the day's events and I turned my head for a minute. When I looked back at Caleb, he was rubbing green beans all over the side of his head above his right ear. There were green beans everywhere! I dumped them out of the hood of his shirt and then cleaned him and the highchair. He kept rubbing his head and shaking it like it hurt. I determined that this must be a sign of a headache or some other ailment, so I gave him some Tylenol. He seemed to be doing better a short while later and went to bed tonight with less than 10 minutes of crying.
On a happier note, Caleb has started saying "kak-kak" when he sees one of his stuffed animal ducks. He loves that thing!
Our parent educator, Amy, came last night and was apparently pleased with Caleb's development. He is doing some things that she was surprised to see: putting toys inside of containers, playing reciprocal games, etc. She suggested that we continue what we're doing and not worry about him at all. She gave us some good ideas for making the battle of wills at mealtimes a little better.
On that note - Caleb LOVES to feed himself these days. He likes to eat graham crackers, cheerios, Gerber puffs, cheese crumbles, deli meat, and diced vegetables, especially green beans. He gets very frustrated when we try to feed him with a spoon and tries to grab it out of our hands at least twice per meal. We gently tell him, "nice hands" and then continue feeding him. If the grabbing continues, we just take the food away and walk away from him for a minute. We come back and try again after a minute or so. If the grabbing starts again, we say, "Uh-oh, all done." and take it away completely. He is not happy when that happens!
Tonight, after eating an entire jar of sweet potatoes, Caleb had some diced green beans on his highchair tray. Rudy and I were talking about the day's events and I turned my head for a minute. When I looked back at Caleb, he was rubbing green beans all over the side of his head above his right ear. There were green beans everywhere! I dumped them out of the hood of his shirt and then cleaned him and the highchair. He kept rubbing his head and shaking it like it hurt. I determined that this must be a sign of a headache or some other ailment, so I gave him some Tylenol. He seemed to be doing better a short while later and went to bed tonight with less than 10 minutes of crying.
On a happier note, Caleb has started saying "kak-kak" when he sees one of his stuffed animal ducks. He loves that thing!
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Caleb's First Haircut
We took Caleb to Snip Its last night for his very first haircut! He did awesome - no tears and very little wiggling - and came out looking very much like a little boy instead of a baby. Of course, there are lots of pictures on Shutterfly. I'll admit that I got very teary-eyed and had a hard time with the whole event, even though I knew that he desperately needed a haircut!We went to dinner at Mimi's Cafe after the haircut and Caleb had his first grilled cheese sandwich. He loved it! After dinner we came home and played and then prepared for paci rehab - night five. I was amazed when Caleb fussed very briefly (less than a minute, I would guess) and then got completely quiet.
Today has been a slightly different story. Despite being in a great, playful mood, he has cried quite a bit for both of his naps. He cried for about 15 minutes this morning and has been crying for more than 20 minutes as I write this. Carrie said that he's done great at her house for naps. I don't know what the problem is today - maybe it's just because he's at home.
Rudy and I have decided that it's time to lower Caleb's crib to the bottom setting. He is really starting to try to pull up on things and we're afraid he's going to pull himself up and over the top of his crib if we don't get his mattress lowered soon. The past couple of days, he's been fascinated with pulling himself up to standing by holding onto the bottom step of our stairs. He also loves to pull himself up by holding onto our pants or our hands. Last night, I helped him pull up to stand by holding onto the couch and then the little monkey wanted to climb up on the couch. Today, he pulled up on the bottom step and then actually climbed up to the next one. We are in so much trouble! The good thing is that he's still combat crawling, so we know he can't reach things that are up too high...yet.
Thursday, March 8, 2007
Paci Rehab: Night Four
Caleb rocks!!!!!
Night 1 - Monday - cried for almost 2 hours
Night 2 - Tuesday - cried for 15 minutes
Night 3 - Wednesday - cried for 10 minutes
Night 4 - Thursday - cried for 4 minutes
Night 1 - Monday - cried for almost 2 hours
Night 2 - Tuesday - cried for 15 minutes
Night 3 - Wednesday - cried for 10 minutes
Night 4 - Thursday - cried for 4 minutes
Tuesday, March 6, 2007
Paci Rehab: Night Two
I have apparently had more trouble giving up the paci than Caleb has. I have beaten myself up all day about how hard that sweet little baby cried last night. I called Carrie at about 9:00 this morning and apologized profusely for rocking her world too. She was not upset in the least and was just great about it. I worried all day about it and really dreaded the story I would hear when I picked him up. I walked in to Carrie's house and was greeted with nothing but smiles. Carrie said that Caleb cried for just a few minutes this morning before he went to sleep and didn't cry at all before his afternoon nap. He apparently laid down in his bed and played with his hands for about 5 minutes and then rolled over and fell asleep. Praise the Lord! Well, that's all great and everything, but it's a whole different story at home when he's going into his big bed and Mama or Daddy are walking out of the room and turning off the light. Rudy and I decided that it might go better if he did it, since Caleb has separation issues with me. We said night-night, gave kisses, waved and all that jazz in the living room. Rudy took him upstairs and did the bedtime routine then put Caleb down for bed. He started screaming as soon as the light went off. We braced ourselves for another long night. Nope. He stopped crying after about 10 or 15 minutes and we haven't heard a peep since. That was 45 minutes ago. All that being said - Rudy and I realize that we are just so very very blessed. Caleb never ceases to amaze us with how he transitions so easily and just keeps smiling through it all.
Paci Rehab: Night Two
I have apparently had more trouble giving up the paci than Caleb has. I have beaten myself up all day about how hard that sweet little baby cried last night. I called Carrie at about 9:00 this morning and apologized profusely for rocking her world too. She was not upset in the least and was just great about it. I worried all day about it and really dreaded the story I would hear when I picked him up. I walked in to Carrie's house and was greeted with nothing but smiles. Carrie said that Caleb cried for just a few minutes this morning before he went to sleep and didn't cry at all before his afternoon nap. He apparently laid down in his bed and played with his hands for about 5 minutes and then rolled over and fell asleep. Praise the Lord! Well, that's all great and everything, but it's a whole different story at home when he's going into his big bed and Mama or Daddy are walking out of the room and turning off the light. Rudy and I decided that it might go better if he did it, since Caleb has separation issues with me. We said night-night, gave kisses, waved and all that jazz in the living room. Rudy took him upstairs and did the bedtime routine then put Caleb down for bed. He started screaming as soon as the light went off. We braced ourselves for another long night. Nope. He stopped crying after about 10 or 15 minutes and we haven't heard a peep since. That was 45 minutes ago. All that being said - Rudy and I realize that we are just so very very blessed. Caleb never ceases to amaze us with how he transitions so easily and just keeps smiling through it all.
Monday, March 5, 2007
Big Changes
Caleb has done great with his tubes. We haven't had any problems at all! Yeah!!!! The day after the tubes went in, he started to babble more. We even heard "Mamamama" for the first time! He's now doing a lot of consonants and a lot of vowels too. He still prefers "dadadadada" and that's his response any time you try to get him to talk to you.
As far as mobility - Caleb is still doing his ever-popular wounded soldier routine. He has started to prop up on his left side pretty often, though. We're thinking this may be the precursor to learning to sit up on his own. He can now readily go from sitting to crawling. We've started to see more rocking on his knees too. I don't think it'll be long before he's crawling up on his hands and knees, but I've been saying that for weeks now, so we're just waiting. Caleb's newest love is pulling up from sitting to standing by holding onto my arms. He loves to grab on and then stand right up! He can't stand alone, so I support his hips or under his arms, but he has quite a bit of strength in those little legs.
This past weekend, we went to Hot Springs for a visit. On Friday night, we flew in to Little Rock. Mom picked us up at the airport and we made a b-line for Hot Springs. We were exhausted! Saturday was a relaxing day of napping and visiting with family. We went to see Aunt Harolyn and Uncle Poppie's new house they are building. It's going to be so pretty! We went to dinner with Mom, Pepapa and Anna Joyce at KJ's Grill. Ms. Kelly (one of the owners) came and got Caleb and took him back in the kitchen for a look around. She said he loved it and was most impressed by the ice machine and the noise that it made. Mr. L. came home from deer camp on Sunday and had a blast playing with Caleb. We went to Pepapa and Anna Joyce's to celebrate Uncle Jimmy's 40th birthday. Jimmy and Kim came over from Sheridan and we enjoyed visiting with everyone. Caleb even got to have a little cake and ice cream since it was a special occasion.
Sunday was a day of firsts too. All of a sudden, Caleb decided that he would start waving to everyone and everything. He waved at us all day and all night! He also discovered that he can make interesting sounds with his tongue. For 2 days now, he has been clucking and clicking his tongue like crazy. It's pretty amusing - especially to him. He's also getting better at clapping. He tries so hard to get his little hands together, but sometimes he misses.
Tonight was a dark night in Caleb's very young life. When we got home from Arkansas, it was time to say goodbye to our beloved pacifiers. To keep us from giving in and giving them back to him, I actually threw them in the trash - all of them - gone. I allowed him to have them through today, because we were flying and I needed to be able to give Caleb a pacifier in case his ears hurt, but once we got home - POOF - they were gone! I paid the price, too. I put Caleb down to bed like normal at 8:45. He screamed and screamed and SCREAMED for an hour and 45 minutes! I tried everything: I put him in bed and walked out. I rocked him. I read a story. I turned the lights low. I turned the lights off. I turned on music, then turned it back off again. I sat in the rocking chair next to his bed, I folded clothes in his room, I walked the floor with him and I rubbed his back. Finally, I gave up. I decided to fight one battle at a time. I scooped him up and brought him to bed with me. This is the one thing that always works, right? He started screaming all over again. Finally, it actually got a little funny. The sad little sounds he was making were just plain pitiful and I had to laugh to keep from crying myself. Eventually, the poor little guy had all he could take and he went from crying/screaming/moaning/wailing to snoring in a matter of seconds. I let him get into a good, deep sleep and I carried him to his room. That was over an hour ago and he's still sleeping...
I know the next few days/nights are going to be rough, but I really want to stop the pacifier usage now. I actually wanted to stop it at 6 months, but that's when the ear problems were starting to get really bad and I just couldn't take it away from him. Now, he's reached a point where he doesn't have a developmental need to suck anymore. He is old enough to self-soothe when he's upset and he's old enough to get himself to sleep. I want to get rid of the pacifier now - before it becomes something that he is so hooked on that it will take an all-out war to remove. We're at the point now where we're going to start phasing out the baby stuff (pacifiers, bottles, baby food, etc) and phasing in the big-boy stuff (sippy cups, table food, bowls, etc). I hate to admit that my sweet little baby is growing up so fast, but I have to do what I have to do. This feels right and it's what I'm going to do. So...bye-bye paci. We'll miss you - but only for a few days.
As far as mobility - Caleb is still doing his ever-popular wounded soldier routine. He has started to prop up on his left side pretty often, though. We're thinking this may be the precursor to learning to sit up on his own. He can now readily go from sitting to crawling. We've started to see more rocking on his knees too. I don't think it'll be long before he's crawling up on his hands and knees, but I've been saying that for weeks now, so we're just waiting. Caleb's newest love is pulling up from sitting to standing by holding onto my arms. He loves to grab on and then stand right up! He can't stand alone, so I support his hips or under his arms, but he has quite a bit of strength in those little legs.
This past weekend, we went to Hot Springs for a visit. On Friday night, we flew in to Little Rock. Mom picked us up at the airport and we made a b-line for Hot Springs. We were exhausted! Saturday was a relaxing day of napping and visiting with family. We went to see Aunt Harolyn and Uncle Poppie's new house they are building. It's going to be so pretty! We went to dinner with Mom, Pepapa and Anna Joyce at KJ's Grill. Ms. Kelly (one of the owners) came and got Caleb and took him back in the kitchen for a look around. She said he loved it and was most impressed by the ice machine and the noise that it made. Mr. L. came home from deer camp on Sunday and had a blast playing with Caleb. We went to Pepapa and Anna Joyce's to celebrate Uncle Jimmy's 40th birthday. Jimmy and Kim came over from Sheridan and we enjoyed visiting with everyone. Caleb even got to have a little cake and ice cream since it was a special occasion.
Sunday was a day of firsts too. All of a sudden, Caleb decided that he would start waving to everyone and everything. He waved at us all day and all night! He also discovered that he can make interesting sounds with his tongue. For 2 days now, he has been clucking and clicking his tongue like crazy. It's pretty amusing - especially to him. He's also getting better at clapping. He tries so hard to get his little hands together, but sometimes he misses.
Tonight was a dark night in Caleb's very young life. When we got home from Arkansas, it was time to say goodbye to our beloved pacifiers. To keep us from giving in and giving them back to him, I actually threw them in the trash - all of them - gone. I allowed him to have them through today, because we were flying and I needed to be able to give Caleb a pacifier in case his ears hurt, but once we got home - POOF - they were gone! I paid the price, too. I put Caleb down to bed like normal at 8:45. He screamed and screamed and SCREAMED for an hour and 45 minutes! I tried everything: I put him in bed and walked out. I rocked him. I read a story. I turned the lights low. I turned the lights off. I turned on music, then turned it back off again. I sat in the rocking chair next to his bed, I folded clothes in his room, I walked the floor with him and I rubbed his back. Finally, I gave up. I decided to fight one battle at a time. I scooped him up and brought him to bed with me. This is the one thing that always works, right? He started screaming all over again. Finally, it actually got a little funny. The sad little sounds he was making were just plain pitiful and I had to laugh to keep from crying myself. Eventually, the poor little guy had all he could take and he went from crying/screaming/moaning/wailing to snoring in a matter of seconds. I let him get into a good, deep sleep and I carried him to his room. That was over an hour ago and he's still sleeping...
I know the next few days/nights are going to be rough, but I really want to stop the pacifier usage now. I actually wanted to stop it at 6 months, but that's when the ear problems were starting to get really bad and I just couldn't take it away from him. Now, he's reached a point where he doesn't have a developmental need to suck anymore. He is old enough to self-soothe when he's upset and he's old enough to get himself to sleep. I want to get rid of the pacifier now - before it becomes something that he is so hooked on that it will take an all-out war to remove. We're at the point now where we're going to start phasing out the baby stuff (pacifiers, bottles, baby food, etc) and phasing in the big-boy stuff (sippy cups, table food, bowls, etc). I hate to admit that my sweet little baby is growing up so fast, but I have to do what I have to do. This feels right and it's what I'm going to do. So...bye-bye paci. We'll miss you - but only for a few days.
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